BCsPage.com
– Reviews: Old e-mail reviews circa 1999/2000
Maintained by and
for Bob Cooley (me!)
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In 1999/2000 I wrote reviews of films I
saw and e-mailed them to my friends (soon to be ex-friends... who knew spamming
would become so objectionable?). Here, in answer to the overwhelming,
clamoring demand, are those reviews. Whee!
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The Thirteenth Floor 5/99
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The
thirteenth floor is a cyber thriller with film noir touches about a programming
company that has designed an alternate reality that a user can interact
with as if it is his real life. In the opening of the film the owner of
the company is experiencing the Los Angeles of 1937. He leaves a message
with the bartender of a lavish Hollywood night- spot, returns to his
present time and is promptly murdered.
The
main suspect is his right hand man in the company, who can’t remember
what he was doing at the time but is not really the murderous type. It is
left to him to enter the computerized 1937 and retrieve the message left
with the bartender.
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The
film has many imaginative twists and turns. It unfolds at it’s own pace as
an intriguing mystery with science fiction elements. The visuals are often imaginative,
although obviously low budget. The overall theme is a Philip K. Dick-ian
“what is reality?” An astute viewer will probably be about 10 minutes ahead
of the ending, but “The Thirteenth
Floor” is a mostly intelligent and amiable film which is worth seeing if
you’re into this sort of thing. You know who you are.
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Notting Hill 5/99
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For
those of us in despair over the sad state of the Hollywood romantic comedy,
Notting Hill is an instructive example of what’s going right, what’s gone
wrong, and probably what will never be again.
On the plus side the film has a winning premise
that is perfectly cast. Hugh Grant is a down to earth widower running a
travel bookstore in a trendy section of London. Julia Roberts is a world
famous American movie star who is not as successful in her personal life.
She wanders into the shop while breaking from a film shoot, and the
romance slowly begins. She needs a port in the storm of shallow,
unfulfilling relationships and constant media scrutiny; he needs some
excitement and glamour in his humdrum life.
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The film uses Roberts’ persona to excellent
advantage, but her performance is somewhat tired, as has sadly been the case
for most her recent body of work. Although
“Pretty Woman” is not a
great film, Roberts’ vivacious, charming performance was a career maker
that she has been unable to recapture. Where she has the potential to be a
decent Carole Lombard (tough, cynical, funny with a feminine warmth
underneath), lately she seems to be going for Ingrid Bergman (worn-down and
abused, yet nobly carrying on). While Carol Lombard is a tough act to
follow, nobody but Ingrid Bergman can be Ingrid Bergman. One longs to see
Roberts’ in another secure, aggressive role where her positives are
emphasized.
Hugh Grant, however, can do no wrong when it comes to
sophisticated romantic comedy. Charming and unassuming as ever, he tones
down the awkward clumsiness and turns up the charm, openness and warmth to
generally steal the movie. As practically Hollywood’s sole consistent
practitioner of romantic comedy, an entire genre seems to have fallen on
his shoulders. Harrison Ford should have been carrying the torch, perhaps
Pierce Brosnan or Rupert Everett will carry on, but for now Hugh Grant is
all we’ve got. That’s not a complaint; the art form couldn’t be in better
hands.
When Grant takes Roberts to dinner and to meet his eccentric
family, their openness and support of each other wins her over and she
begins to fall in love. Here the script makes it’s first minor miscue as
we’re left to wonder if Roberts is falling in love with Grant or his
lifestyle, an issue the film never addresses or even acknowledges. The
awkward courtship is sketchily written and it is up to the stars to make us
believe. It is to their credit that, for the most part, they do.
After a sagging middle section in which the script
predictably contrives to keep them apart via misunderstandings, I’m pleased
to report it finds it's energy again in the final coda. As Grant and his
family work together to get him the girl, there is a genuine feeling of
excitement and fun.
Notting
Hill is a decent romantic comedy, but we’re still left waiting for the
classic blend of sharply focused script and perfectly cast stars that can
revitalize a neglected art form.
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The Story of Us 10/99
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Rob Reiner’s “The Story
of Us” seems to want to be an “Annie Hall” for the 90’s. As in “Annie Hall”, the characters
address the camera and look backward over the highs and lows of their
relationship. Unlike “Annie Hall”,
this is no masterpiece.
Don’t be fooled by
the previews. They give the
impression that the film deals with the comedic trials and tribulations
of raising children. These short
snippets are shown exactly as is at the end of the film and are not
expanded upon.
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“The
Story of Us” tells the story of a married couple, played by Bruce Willis
and Michelle Pfeiffer, who are at a very low point in their marriage. They try to put on a good show for their
children, but they have nothing to say to each other, as is made painfully
clear in a 20 minute section early in the film which consists of nothing
but Willis and Pfeiffer standing around enduring awkward silences.
Willis
comes off a little better than Pfeiffer as the warmer, looser partner in
this stifling marriage. Pfeiffer’s
character, uptight and cold, can’t express her own thoughts or listen to
anyone else’s. As the awkward
silences become knock down-drag out fights you’re left to wonder what these
people ever saw in each other in the first place. One cute scene from early in their
relationship, with Willis tossing paperclips and Pfeiffer protecting
herself with a pith helmet, hardly gives their past the foundation it needs
for us to look beyond their current contentiousness.
The
film generally takes a negative view of marriage, which is not really
surprising given that a successful marriage in Hollywood is measured in
months. Director Reiner, playing a somewhat happily married friend of
Willis’, can say nothing in support of the institution stronger than it
keeps you from being afraid and satisfies your lust. It is left to Pfeiffer, in an amazing
speech at the end of the film, to vocalize what is great about marriage and
why a decent one fallen on hard times is worth saving. The scene drags the film up a notch, but
is too little too late to balance the oppressively pessimistic tone of what
seems to want to be a romantic comedy
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Sleepy
Hollow 11/99
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Tim
Burton’s reworking of Washington Irving’s
gothic horror tale, “The Legend of Sleepy Hollow”, is visually dazzling
but ultimately disappointing to those of us waiting for Burton to find a
script that’s a perfect complement to his unique artistic vision.
Departing
wildly from the source material, the story pits Johnny Depp’s Ichabod
Crane, a prissy turn of the century forensics pioneer, against the ghost
of a sadistic Hession soldier beheaded at the end of the revolutionary
war and eventually the human force behind him. It is left to Crane to
sort the physical from the spiritual and return the Horseman to his grave
forever.
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Along
the way he falls for Christina Ricci’s Katrina, a warm hearted witch and
eventual suspect who tries to persuade Ichabod to look outside the bounds
of the logical and into the realm of the impossible. While a Burton- Depp- Ricci collaboration might
seem like a match made in heaven (or somewhere south of heaven), sparks
seldom fly and Ricci in particular seems mannered and uninvolved. Depp’s
affected characterization is sometimes amusing but ultimately distances the
viewer from the material.
As
you would expect in a Tim Burton film, the dazzling visual style is almost
poetic. There are many thrilling images; among them the Horseman charging out
of the base of a gnarled tree on his mighty steed and an homage to the
climax of the original Universal version of “Frankenstein”. This material
might have been better served by Sam Raimi (Darkman, The Quick and the
Dead), whose flamboyant visual style can, if necessary, carry a movie all
by itself. Burton’s strength, however, lies in the empathy he has for his
misfit characters, and there’s nothing for him to hang his hat on here. The
love story never heats up and the mystery is not solved by his hero, but
clumsily explained by the antagonist in an exposition scene made necessary
by the incomplete script. Had Ichabod faced his inner demons (sketchily
alluded to in beautifully filmed but ultimately pointless dream sequences)
and solved the mystery on a spiritual journey into his own heart, perhaps
the film could have amounted to more than a sometimes magical ride on a
road to nowhere.
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South Park-
Bigger, Longer, Uncut… and The Iron Giant video reviews late 1999
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Who
says the Hollywood musical is dead? Certainly not Trey Parker and Matt
Stone, whose South Park movie is a hilarious tribute to the movie musical
of days gone by, complete with production numbers and dance routines.
Every convention is perfectly in place, from Zeigfeld style dancing
school children to a Les Mis inspirational tearjerker and everything in
between.
Of
course it probably goes without saying that there’s a profane twist to
every convention. It usually takes it’s form in the most unspeakable of four
letter words, uttered with a rapidity and joy not seen on the screen
since the obnoxious heroine of “Blair Witch Project” found ways of
composing whole sentences with nothing but the F- word. In that case it
was merely tiresome, in the case of South Park there is a giddy sense of
liberation and anarchy as the obscenities pile up like a multi-car wreck
until no one is left standing.
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After
an opening number straight out of 1932’s “ One Hour with You”(!), our four little
heroes sneak into the new R- rated Terrance and Phillip movie, “Asses of
Fire”, where they (and we) are propelled into a whole new universe of
wanton vulgarity. As T&P launch into a charming little ditty called
“You’re an Uncle F*****”, the camera zooms in as their innocent little eyes
awaken to the glory of a whole new world, as if the curtain to a universe
just beyond their reach has suddenly been ripped apart. From there our
little potty mouths take their new-found knowledge into the adult world with
an abandon that would make Madonna blush. The adults of South Park are off
to war against the homeland of Terrance and Phillip… Canada!
The
film sags a bit in the middle under the weight of a self-serving
anti-censorship message and the limitations of it's minimalist animation,
but the wonderfully derivative musical numbers never fail to pick it back
up. Meanwhile, Saddam Hussein humiliates Satan in the bedroom, Cartman’s
Mom is found by the boys in an on-line porno and Cartman reprises the ever
popular “Kyle’s Mom’s a Bitch”. There’s something here to offend just about
everyone, but the glee Parker and Stone derive from doing it is infectious,
and for a brief time we relive some of the yearning we had as children to
enter the area of the adult world that was… behind the curtain.
After South Park you may
feel a little bit… dirty, so I’ve got just the remedy… The Iron Giant
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Set
in the Sci-fi nuclear dawn of 1959, the Iron Giant is a charming tale of friendship
and innocence, with themes of cold war paranoia and nuclear age
apprehension gently woven in to create as rich an animated film as has
been seen for quite some time.
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The
story begins as a 500-foot robot of unknown origin crashes from out of the
sky off the coast of the little town of Rockwell. He is discovered in the
night by a boy of twelve-ish named Hogarth, who’s apparently widowed Mom
(voiced by Jennifer Aniston) works long hours as a waitress and doesn’t
have the time she’d like to nurture her increasingly independent son.
Hogarth saves the robot from some high- voltage power lines, ala’ the Mouse
and the Lion, and the bond of friendship is born. The robot has no idea where
he is from or why he is here, thanks to a nasty dent in his cranium, so
with the help of some comic books and a poignant lesson from the remains of
a deer left behind by some scared off hunters, Hogarth turns the robot into
a truly gentle giant.
It’s
not easy to hide a 500-ft. robot, and word gets out. The U.S. government
sends an over-zealous agent from an unidentified agency to scope out the
situation, and Hogarth enlists the aid of a beatnik scrap metal artist
(voiced by Harry Connick Jr.) to keep his friend under wraps. Of course the
situation escalates and the misunderstood giant becomes the hunted prey of
the unthinking military establishment.
With its’ themes of love,
friendship, individuality, nuclear age paranoia and childhood coming of
age, The Iron Giant is a tender and moving picture appropriate and
recommended for children of all ages
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The
World Is Not Enough… Not Quite Enough 11/1999
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The latest installment in the James Bond series,
“The World Is Not Enough”, has just enough going for it to leave you
frustrated. As Pierce Brosnan further stakes his claim as the best Bond
since Sean Connery, beautiful babes abound, bullets fly and witty double
entendres sparkle, all in search of an interesting plot or memorable
villain.
Most of
the conventions a Bond fan expects are sprinkled liberally and enjoyably
throughout the film. Q humorously displays his latest gadgets and makes
his final exit, leaving behind a perfectly cast successor (I won’t ruin
it for you if you haven’t heard).
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The action scenes are well choreographed and
exciting, especially the opening boat chase on the river Thames, marred
somewhat by the silliness of Bond successfully steering a boat careening on
dry land, a bit of nonsense seemingly left over from the Roger Moore days.
The plot involves Bond’s search for an outlaw
Russian terrorist, blandly played by Robert Carlyle, who is seeking revenge
on the three people responsible for a foiled kidnapping plot. Bond’s duty
leads him to protect (and bed, of course) the victim of the failed crime,
the spirited, strong and sexy Sophie Marceau, whose recently deceased oil
baron father was number two on the list, and dispatched in part by an
unwitting Bond. His quest to foil a takeover of European oil pipeline
shipping takes him to Russia and femme fatale number two, Christmas Jones,
played by the beautifully nubile but dialogue challenged Denise Richards.
She would have been better cast portraying a mute, but most men will let
that go, this reviewer included. Robbie Coltrain makes another amusing
appearance as the soft- hearted Russian black market scoundrel (whose name
I don’t happen to have at my fingertips).
As
forgettable as the story and Carlyle’s villain are the production is ably
and enthusiastically mounted, especially by Brosnan. He somehow projects a
fear of and yearning for intimacy that
give his Bond a depth unmatched by any other. The director’s reverence for
the material and adherence to Bond convention make for a good Bond film. A
spellbinding story with a truly challenging villain could make the next one
great.
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The
Straight Story 12/1999
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“The Straight
Story” is a warm, gentle, engaging little film from director David Lynch,
most of whose previous efforts, (“Blue Velvet”, “Dune” and “Wild at
Heart” to name a few) were anything but warm and gentle. The story
concerns an elderly rural retiree named Alvin Straight, vividly created
with a tender, haunting performance by Richard Farnsworth. Alvin, who has
bad knees, weak eyes and emphysema, learns that his brother, hundreds of
miles away, has had a bad stroke. The brothers haven’t spoken in over ten
years because of an argument, the point of which has long been forgotten.
Alvin decides it’s time to mend the fence, and makes plans to visit his
brother with the only vehicle at his disposal… a lawn tractor.
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As Straight takes to the
road for a journey of over three hundred miles on a tractor capable of about
eight miles per hour, Lynch’s true theme is explored: time. Straight, whose
time is running out, has nevertheless made a friend of it. Even though his
time is drawing to a close, he still knows that time is the one commodity
that can be made to work for him, as he patiently lumbers on his journey
while the younger folk around him race to and fro, with sometimes
calamitous results. Combined with Farnsworth’s laid back, sincere
characterization, the result is more than a simple tortoise and hare fable.
Lynch adds in the inevitable rural versus urban lifestyle comparison, but
uses the refreshing strategy of leaving out anything to represent the
urban. We know who we are, and this leaves the obvious, cliched material
pared to a minimum. The only time we feel we’ve seen this film before is in
the few scenes where the wise Straight dispenses life lessons to the
unseasoned characters that he meets along the way. These scenes are kept
low key and in no way undermine the basic beauty of the film.
Lynch has created an ode to
a disappearing way of life; but more importantly, to the people who lived
it. In some ways this is an appreciation of the attitudes and fortitude of
the generation that fought World War II. Straight’s conversation with a
fellow vet at a small town tavern along the way is one of the more poignant
scenes in the film as we learn that even in the Army, as a patient sniper,
Straight was learning to bide his time.
As
the camera follows Straight along sunswept prairies and moonlit fields
toward the Mississippi River and the films fulfilling and moving
denouement, we are gently swept right along with it. Beautifully filmed,
lovingly told and vividly acted, “The Straight Story” is a poetic and
moving examination of American mores and ideals.
Bonus: 2 mini video
reviews:
“Dick”
This is bad sketch comedy with a
clever premise. Two teenage girls become friends with Richard Nixon in 1973
and eventually cause the collapse of a presidency. This allegory, in which
a nerdy high school girl symbolizes an America betrayed by its’ president,
never gets off the ground. An appallingly unfunny script combined with
overly broad performances by mostly second rate sketch comics (Will Ferrel,
Dave Foley, etc…) make this a predominately wooden affair. It’s one saving grace
is the gutsy performance of Kirsten Dunst as the naïve girl who becomes
enamored of Tricky Dick. She somehow manages to find some heart and depth
in a film whose script contains neither. It is almost worth the price of a
rental to watch an inspired performer single handedly carry dreck of this
magnitude, but when the final “Dick” joke is unfurled even the courageous
Dunst cannot escape unscathed.
“The General’s
Daughter”
Let’s none of us waste too much time
with this one, huh? John Travolta is a military investigator trying to get
to the bottom of the brutal rape of a General’s daughter at a military
base. It’s a mystery with one suspect and no motives. The plot meanders on,
pointing our attention in no direction at all, while pretentious cross
cutting underlines the fact that this film is about NOTHING. We’re given no
information to try to unravel the mystery, so we sit there like kidnapped
passengers on a road to nowhere. Travolta and James Woods have a couple of
fun scenery chewing scenes, but other than that it’s real slim pickens. If
you’re in the mood for bad, scenery chewing, military base conspiracy
films, try 1981’s “Taps”. Over-blown, dumb and predictable work to it’s
advantage as two future mega-stars, Tom Cruise and Sean Penn, demonstrate
what scenery chewing is all about.
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Two mini video reviews 5/2005
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"Bowfinger"
Either
somebody connected with Steve Martin’s Bowfinger paid off the national critics
or I’m missing something. Lauded from coast to coast, I found the film
mildly amusing at best. The preposterous premise is this: a low rent film
producer (Martin), with the assistance of a group of rag-tag hangers on,
uses a major Hollywood action star (Eddie Murphy) in his Z-movie by filming
him surreptitiously as he goes about his daily routine. The paranoid star
is pushed to the verge of a nervous breakdown.
Had
some level of subtlety been considered, this could have been an insightful
comedy about one man’s love of filmmaking and his passionate yet misplaced
attempts to get his vision to the screen. They try to throw that angle in
at the end, but it’s too little too late. For that film see Joe Dante’s
1992 “Matinee”(with John Goodman).
It could have been a sly satire about the absurdities that abound in Tinsel
Town, but the references, including a wicked slam at Scientology, are much
too broad to be genuinely hilarious. For that movie see Barry Sonnenfeld’s 1995 “Get Shorty”.
What
does work is Murphy’s duel role as his action star’s dweeby brother. The
character has a genuineness that is missing from the rest of the ensemble,
which of course makes him endearing and…funny.
Also somewhat effective is Heather Graham as a farm girl earnestly sleeping
her way through the film’s crew to get to the top…of the bottom.
Bowfinger
is harmless, instantly forgotten and nowhere near as much fun as it
shoulda, coulda, been.
"Deep Blue Sea"
This
silly actioner from director Renny Harlin is a decent time waster if you’re
looking to disengage the brain, munch some popcorn and kill one hour forty.
The story involves three renegade, genetically engineered sharks hunting
down their former captors after a series of accidents and mistakes evens
the odds by destroying most of an underwater research facility. The digital
special effects veer wildly from believable to ridiculous, as does the
plot. If you’re in the mood for silly fun, that’s what “Deep Blue Sea” is
happy, even proud, to provide.
note:
some misguided soles have uttered the unfortunate phrase “better than
Jaws”(!). AS IF… they have hereby relinquished their right to an opinion…
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Disagree?
Something to add? E-mail me and I’ll post your responses!
bob@bcspage.com
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